Stopped at the lights in the city just after midday, I reflexively opened Tinder and had a quick swipe. I matched with a woman with a kind smile and before the lights turned green I’d written to her
“You’re gorgeous”
“Must be just the light in the photos”
“And humble too!”
By the time I arrived at my AA meeting in South Melbourne we’d arranged to meet outside the Northcote town hall at 3pm and go for a walk. On the drive over I’d worked out my opening line
“Hey Sue! It’s not just the light you really are gorgeous”
She was, sparkly green brown eyes, fine features, upmarket hippy dress sense, skinny and taut. She reached up and took my sunglasses off.
“You’re gorgeous too!”
“I just got these sunnies, are they working for me”
“Totally”
We began to walk. There was no small talk we just dropped in deep. She had been married for 18 years, had a 5 year old girl, a close friend had died and the marriage had been torn apart by grief. Her husband hand ended up with the wife of the friend who had died. There was no sense that we’d just met, it instantly felt like talking to an old friend. We walked to a nearby park and sat on a bench. Stories of pain and loss and addiction and post marriage dating poured out completely naturally from both sides. An hour passed in what seemed like minutes. We walked to Northcote Social club. I ordered a Coke and told her not to not drink I my behalf
“Don’t worry, I wouldn’t”
she said and ordered a soda water.
She told me she was a kinesiologist with 20 years experience. Had made a living a bought a house doing it. She said it was a mixture of Eastern and Western practice. I asked her to show me something. She stood up and asked me to do the same. She stood in front of me, locked eyes with me and told be raise my arms to horizontal. She applied some downward pressure on my forearms and I resisted. Then she flicked my shoulders and applied the pressure again and my arms moved. As she was doing this we locked eyes and I was hit with an explosion of energy and her face began to glow, she went from pretty to overwhelmingly beautiful, otherworldly. I felt full of warmth and peace. I started grinning uncontrollably. She repeated this procedure a few times but I was having trouble listening to what she was explaining to me. She put my arms back at my side and sat down opposite me. The light went out. She was back to the woman I’d been with a couple of minutes before
“What the fuck was that?!? How do you DO that?”
“It’s something I’ve had to learn to control. I only really access it for treatments. It was a problem when I was younger and didn’t know how to harness it.”
“This is a GOOD first date. Where should we go next?”
“I need to get back to Castlemaine.”
She’d explained she had a house in Northcote and a house in Castlemaine (Northcote North as some call it)
“I’ll give you a lift! We can have dinner there. Beats catching the train!”
“I dunno about that Joe. I’ve had dinner in Castlemaine too many times. Where do live?”
“Footscray.”
“Let’s have dinner there. I still have never tried Ethiopian.”
“Me neither!”
Soon she was in my car looking at the school photos of my daughters on the dash. The conversation didn’t stop. No topic led to a dead end. Everything flowed so naturally that I could relax and enjoy it. We had a quick tour of my apartment then walked through the buzzing streets of Footscray to an Ethiopian restaurant. We peered in through grimy windows at a dimly lit nearly empty room. A young kind with white blond hair gave us the OK sign and waved us in. Sue fell in love with the waitress and told her how beautiful she was. Our conversation, like a catch up with an old friend, barely stopped to sponge up the rich curry-like dishes.
“I’ll just check the trains”
she said as we got the bill
“OK, but I don’t mind driving you, I like driving.”
“It’s an hour and half!”
“I know.”
I smiled and she shook her head.
I floored it round the C shaped onramp and my powerful black Commodore hammered from zero to a hundred as we hit the freeway. I put on Tom Petty. Runnin’ Down a Dream. She said she’d never heard Tom Petty.
“I wish I was you then Sue!”
I said and turned it up to full.
It was night now, we’d been together 6 hours. I asked if could hold her hand as I drove. She said yes.
“I’m feeling this deep intense connection with you Sue. Are you feeling it too?
“Yep. I am.”
She smiled.
Learning To Fly came on and she realised she DID know Tom Petty.
We arrived in Castlemaine and the stars dazzled down on her yard. She gave me a tour of the house. We kissed. A peck. Then she realised she’s left her car in Kyneton. We were back on the road. We made it to Kyneton train station. We made out in the car. Said our goodbyes.
Flying down the freeway home I messaged friends to tell them the good news. The previous Sunday a friend from AA had told me to hand over control of my romantic relationships to my higher power. Sue seemed like an instant reward for letting go. Suddenly cars were looming up behind me. I was under power. I pulled off the road just as I ran out of petrol. I called Sue who had to get up 6am, it was now 1. She was bright and breezy and said no worries. When she arrived an hour later with a jerry can I gave her a big bear hug. It was hold now, and I held her close as cars flew by. We went and got petrol together, found our way back onto the freeway and parted ways again
“I miss you!”
I yelled as she drove away. I was lit up all the way home.
The next day a long message came through. Sue had reflected on the experience and decided we should just be friends. As she’d told me the night before she’s not one give up her “womb wisdom” easily. It felt like a hammer blow. I’d pencilled Sue it for at least 20 years of glorious happiness. For a starring role in The Joe Show. I messaged back to say that was fine but could we talk on the phone. She sounded different. Told me she was scared. The following day I got a message saying that she had a strong feeling that what we had was a one time thing and that we should never see each other again.
“Maybe I was just meant to introduce you to kinesiology? ”
“Nah I reckon you’re making a mistake. But I love you anyway. Bye Sue”
I’m learning to fly, but I ain’t got wings
Comin’ down, is the hardest thing
Tom Petty